M's 3, Rangers 1
Note well the "Postgame" headline


Writing Mariners, for amigos who hate watching the Mariners, presents its own challenges.  On the whole, though, it's both amusing and less difficult, therefore a gratifying pursuit.  Observe as we simply, and quite objectively, describe the action on Friday:

1.  James Paxton blew away the leadoff hitter on five fastballs.  DeShields never got a sniff.


2.  The TV guys warned that Shin-Soo Choo was way dialed in.

2a.  K-Pax rocked, pinwheeled, and fired a screaming meemie, knee-high:

If only I could do this...  Hey, if only Felix Hernandez could do it
If only I could do this.... Hey, if only Felix Hernandez could do it

2b.  Choo leisurely rocked, pinwheeled, and hit a 150 MPH bullet back through the box.  Think Charlie Brown upside down and spinning.  Think what a perfect paste-in that would be right here, except for we don't want to write Peanuts, Inc. and get permission. Well, we can link, at least.  Imagine if you could throw 95 MPH, and you threw that 95 MPH into a teacup, and then imagine this happening as a direct result.  I just don't get modern athletes.

2c.  Dr. D wondered, for the thousandth time, how saberdog lifetime baseball fans deny the existence of hot streaks.

2asterisk.  Next time Choo was up, EXACTLY! I mean EXACTLY! the same thing happened.  Paxton even used the same shoulder-duck-protects-your-head motion on the mound.  No, we're not kidding.


3.  One on, one out, one ball, one strike, James Paxton threw a fastball that very nearly hit Adrian Beltre in the knee.  The radar gun read 96 MPH.  Beside that pitch in the dictionary, you have the entry "The Ultimate Baseball Weapon."  The caption on the next line is structural, by the way.

Find me a better pitch in all of human history
Find me a better pitch in all of human history

3a.  Adrian Beltre rocked his knee back and shocked a frozen rope into right field for a single.


4.  With Gallardo, Hamels, Faulkner, etc., Dr. D wondered when the last time was, that he saw a team this *HOT.*  The answer:  that time the Nationals came into Safeco.


5.  Prince Fielder came up to bat.  The TV graphic said "4-for-5 vs James Paxton" or something very similar.  Dr. D's eyes looked as puppy-dog sad as, say, those of James Paxton right before he blows Prince Fielder away.  Using two hands on those hammer-box TNT devices.  If you want technical-type details, it was

  • Curve
  • Smokeball
  • Curve
  • Smokeball, garbage swing, Prince Fielder wondered what he ever saw in the game of baseball


6.  Mike Napoli walked.  On Strike Two.  To load 'em up.  I've been told that bases loaded, two out, power pitcher on power hitter is an exciting situation.


7.  K-Pax detonated Mitch Moreland.  With two hands on a plunger-box thingie.  Using a 96 MPH left-on-left fastball, letter high, that was just a rumor to Moreland.  This time there was a wispy mushroom cloud in the batter's box, about eight feet high or so.

This, gentlemen, was the James Paxton of late 2013.  The one who was at once (a) a major work in progress, and (b) unhittable.  Just like Randy Johnson 1991.  I think I'm going to cry.

There was a later AB, forget who, where K-Pax started with a gorgeous 86 MPH change.  The AB was, of course, a strikeout.  Anytime K-Pax gets the hitters at all "in between," the argument is completely over.  The only reason he ever gets hit is because they're sitting fastball only.   One of these days, man, one of these days...



Came in to close the fifth for Paxton, who was on a pitch count.  His first two pitches had me out of my seat.  Din't reconize 'im.  Not whatsoever.  He crouched his shoulders, kept his head leaning to 3B, and stayed as compact as a potato bug all the way through.  Rather than flinging the ball, he drove it.

  • Hot fastball, called strike one (on Napoli).
  • Invisible change curve, garbage swing strike two.
  • Hot fastball 0-2, Napoli took an emergency swing and bounced into a GIDP.

But the next inning, Farquahar's shoulders and head leaned back to 1B, he went to the cutter, and the old Danny was back.  Old Danny, with everything he's doing wrong, is still an 8-9 strikeout reliever.

If you're one of the many in-house Mariner stat geeks lurking here, you know who you are.  Review the video, confirm that Dr. Detecto is once again correct about the potato bug thing, and relay it to Chris Woodward or somebody who can follow up.  Drive home safely.



Dr. D couldn't believe his eyes when the M's took him up on his offer to put Elias in the bullpen.  (Yes, we're back to tongue in cheek.  But not about Farquhar, potato bugs, fastballs and curve balls.)

Elias started out 3-and-0 on some left hand hitter.  Checking it ... oh!  It was none other than Shin-Babe Choo.  And on Elias' face, you could see every negative emotion he ever had in Tacoma.

He came back to fan Choo, and strutted off the mound like a peacock.  But the scent of the mini-tantrum lingered.  And SSI recalled that Roenis Elias does not have a scintillating track record in responding to baseball disappointment.  That could be a makeup issue for major league relief pitchers, I dunno.



Mark Trumbo lined a single to lead off the sixth inning, and Jones came in to run / play center.  Jones is what, 28/29 on stolen bases?  That's the same thing as adding 26 walks to his career 350 PA's, which makes him ... oh.  Still the kind of thing pitchers focus on to go to sleep and dream like babies.  But what a benchie.

The point is, Gallardo, one of their aces, is a power righty with a slow motion.  Here we go, 29/30 and a tasty little insurance run.  Lemme pause this and go get a ham-and-butter-on-wheat-toast with mineral water.

Except!  Before we can even get fully out of the bean bag chair, the Ranger manager (who knows or cares who he is) pops out of the dugout and yanks Gallardo at 90 pitches.  So that a lefty scrub reliever could hold Jones on.  Now that, we are here to tell you, is the power of speed.  It's worth more than a 101-game win starter.  

Granted, the lefty Seth and LoMo were up next and the scrub reliever is the next Chris Sale.  But that had little to do with it.



Astros lost!  Astros lost!  M's down only 5, with fourteen full games remaining!

Saturday's game is pregnant with possibility.  If the M's can cobble out a lucky win, they got Felix Sunday.  Wow!  Just like a pennant race....

Be Afraid, 

Dr. D




"Writing Mariners for amigos who hate watching the Mariners..."

We're like the people who refused to leave their land during The Dust Bowl. Here's to ya, Doc.

Hmm... I just watched a fantastic movie called "Wild River" last night about an elderly women in 1930's Tennessee who stubbornly refuses to leave her river-island land despite the fact that the TVA is about to complete a dam that will leave it under 20 feet of water. Highly recommend the movie, but hopefully she's not an apt comparison for us, 'cause she ended up dying and they flooded her land. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0054476/

It would be hope-inducing if the M's were able to scratch their way back to .500 for the season.

Imagine if:

Felix had posted his typical 2.25 ERA.

Cano had hit all season like he did in the second half.

The bullpen produced as expected.

One could mention a lot of other things, but if just those three things had happened, all very reasonable, we would be in the thick of a postseason chase with a legitimate shot at the division title.

Writing Mariners, for amigos who hate watching the Mariners - See more at: http://baseball.seattlesportsinsider.com/blogs/postgame/ms-3-rangers-1#s...

You thought Mariners ... Dust Bowl ... people specifically in the Dust Bowl ... your thoughts floated off to starvation, drowning and despair ...


As I almost always do wit' cha.  ... adding to your list:  their 1st-half RISP.  Sigghhhhhhhh


This late season run almost guarantees Lloyd his job next year, I would think. Not 100% mind you, but he's no longer an automatic for getting the pink slip.

A good friend of mine here in Chicago is a big Indians fan. The last two weeks we've been watching in amazement as our seasons have gone from lost to very interesting. Marte isn't quite Lindor, but he's been a big piece. Add that to the boys hitting like the back of their baseball cards, as Lloyd would say, and you've really got something.

This team ain't so bad afterall. All it took was getting rid of the two Z-boys (Zduriencik and Zunino).


Mojo called that one about two weeks before it happened, and when the M's Shaved the Beard their renaissance ignited.

Yeah, that's what I keep musing:  Lloyd McClendon leans closer to a 2016 gig with every additional win.  Last night when the M's were up 3-0 and Paxton's radar frazzed out, you could see the sick look on his face again.  He's invested.  ... where are you on that, Dan?  You bring McC back?


Read your link on President Obama.  Amazing.  Going to Konspiracy Korner it, here or DOV Mainframe, shortly.  Thanks for linking us up.

Meanwhile, I'd be mightily fascinated in your take on the leading Republican (and Democratic) nominees.  Would probably mosh off those for several KK's.  (Perhaps I should provide an article stub first; this comment thread would be a little off-key.)

Not meaning to rankle you, Hillary jumped on Trump for the Islamic faux pas, and for rhetoric that is too harsh, apparently as hard as she was able, using the word "hate" very frequently.  (If Trump honestly had it in for Muslims, that would of course be reprehensible, though Ben Carson graciously surmised that Trump hadn't processed the question well.)

GOP pundits talked demagoguery, in view of everything Hillary's camp did to the Obamas during that earlier race.  Does Hillary's angry denunciation of sharp rhetoric give you pause at all?  Or it's just politics?  Honestly curious your take, which is always enlightening.


Pick Rubio and take the points.  

All in all, I prefer my presidents to have been governors (which requires a different skill set than the legislative branch)....of course Carter was the exception to that rule.

But no matter, Rubio has an inviting personality, a compelling story, a brain for policy (and its ramifications) and the ability to articulate it all.  

Over a long race, that's potent mix.


We should get everybody on the record a year out.  I bet like only 20% tab the winnin' horse.

Rubio, yeah, interesting if an underdog ... honestly, I'm impressed at the quality of the entire field this cycle.  As opposed to the last few cycles.


I'll take Carli.

I just believe that there is enough anger out in the Republican / Conservative world that most feel an outsider MUST be elected... and Carli appears to speak to most direct on issues without upsetting too many of those true base Republicans.


Terrific ticket. Tac.......you and me!  Remember Spahn and Sain and pray for rain?  How about Moe and Tac and pray for....gak?  Or....pray for crack?  Wait...how about pray for frack?  Nah...those don't work.  Let's go for Tac and Moe and pray for snow!  WooooHoooo, that one has style.  

I'm 6-1 in Mayoral races (won 2, lost 1, won 4) and 5-1 in Port Commissioner races (lost 1 then won 5), btw.  So I'm either hot....or due for an election butt-whooped land slide loss.  Take your pick.

I did win in the 3rd grade Line Monitor election, however.  

The Honorable,



I remember reading a couple posts over the years on SSI where you were called the Mayor, but I had no idea that you have done so much for the region. You are a true glutton for punishment and abuse... but thank you for your civil service.

As for a ticket / politics, I am not savy enough to keep my mouth shut when dealing with idiots... I'd rather see us in charge of the M's farm system or just contributors to the next few M's drafts.

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